Today is a twofer. I myself am struggling with some worry over some things about which I have no control. Some of my current worry I do have some control over and I’m navigating that as best as I can- school work, job, housework… I’m worried about getting it all done, finishing well, doing a good job, getting my house in order. But this other worry is a doozy and if I let it take over I won’t be able to accomplish anything. In fact, it will probably impact the worries I have about the things I do have control over and render me unable to properly function.
I don’t know about you but my body responds almost immediately to stress. When anxiety pops up, especially a big one (but also all the little ones) I can feel my heart start to beat faster, my stomach clenches, my head hurts and I feel like I’m about to go to war. My adrenaline response is a killer. I am a fixer. I am a fighter. I am ready to do what I have to do. But when these responses occur over something I cannot fix, fight, or do anything about, over something that is overwhelmingly terrifying, my worry has the potential to knock me out for the count. I can’t breathe, I can’t sleep, I feel jittery, ready to cry at the drop of a hat…. basically, my whole body, mind and spirit becomes hijacked by the worry and I become a passenger in the Anxiety Taxi Cab. I have lived like this my entire life. I honestly don’t know if I have a memory that isn’t tinged in some way by worry and anxiety. It has taken my whole life to learn strategies and techniques to take back the wheel so that I can refocus and really make sense of what is happening so that I can move forward. When clarity comes I often learn that I CAN fix it, I CAN fight it, I CAN do something. This is great and it helps me get through the small worries. But the big ones, boy, well, they can derail me. Today, for example, I was hit with a situation that causes me so much worry that it was by sheer force of will that I am writing this blog at all. Making it home without crying my eyes out was a challenge. But here I am, on task, just finished my school assignment, now I’m working on this blog, and then I will cook dinner. This is all I can do to keep the worry from taking me over. I cannot control this and I have to surrender the worry that threatens to debilitate me. One task at a time, one breath at a time, one moment at a time.
The second part of today’s post is to surrender to prayer. I figured this goes well with surrendering worry. You all know by now that I am a Christian and my faith, my relationship with God, is the only thing that will get me through this worry. For you, that may be the universe, the Creator, Divine…. For me it’s God.
I am reminded of Philippians 4:6-7, Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Now, I understand that this verse may have no meaning for you, it does for me and I’m sure it will impact some of you as exactly right, but even if it doesn’t, it speaks to the message of the card which is to surrender to prayer. I HAVE to surrender to God, praying with all that I am, so that the I feel some peace over the big worries that come. I may not get the answer I want. I may not get the resolution I long for but I will get the peace that I desperately need. If I truly believe that every situation, everything we experience has meaning and teaches us valuable lessons, so that we can achieve the purpose of our soul, our very creation, then I have to put my faith in surrendering to prayer to the only One with the power to comfort me. After all, I believe my Creator made me and all of you for a reason, with a purpose. So the worry has to go so that I can fulfill that purpose.
Prayer, to whomever you pray to, may not render you your desired outcomes. Prayer does offer a semblance of peace and acceptance that is required for a good night sleep, or any sleep at all. It helps stabilize you so that you can whether the storms of life when they threaten to destroy everything. I find that prayer is really the best medication for worry. We are human, so we will worry, and we will be upset. But prayer helps us keep the worry from driving our lives. That’s the key. Worry keeps us from that divine purpose so we have to cast it out and prayer can help you do that.
So if you are carrying a heavy burden of worry and anxiety, cast hem all out with prayer. There is no science to prayer, no words you have to say to make it count. Prayer is unique to each of us so pray the way you need to. Let whoever it is you pray to help you carry the burden of your fears. Don’t let the worry keep you from living your best life no matter how big the situation is that is burdening you with your worry. And again, as always, remember that you are not alone. We can navigate our worry together. If you can’t pray for yourself, I’ll pray for you as I pray for myself and all the rest of us anxiety driven humans.
Hang in there people. Take care. I’m here if you need me.